Talking to Your Partner About Condoms


It's much smarter to talk about condoms before having sex,
but that doesn't make it easy. Some people — even those who are already
having sex — are embarrassed by the topic of condoms. But not talking
about condoms affects a person's safety. Using condoms properly every
time is the best protection against STDs— even if you're using another form of birth control like the Pill.

So how can you overcome your embarrassment about talking about
condoms? Well, for starters it can help to know what a condom looks
like, how it works, and what it's like to handle one. Buy a box of
condoms so you can familiarize yourself.

The next thing to get comfortable with is bringing up the topic of
condoms with a partner. Practice opening lines. If you think your
partner will object, work out your response ahead of time. Here are some
possibilities:

Your partner says: "It's uncomfortable."
You might answer this by suggesting a different brand or size. Wearing a condom also may take some getting used to.

Your partner says: "It puts me right out of the mood."
Say that having unsafe sex puts you right out of the mood. Permanently.

Your partner says: "If we really love each other, we should trust each other."
Say that it's because you love each other so much that you want to be sure you're both safe and protect each other.

Your partner says: "Are you nervous about catching something?"
The natural response: "Sometimes people don't even know when they have infections, so it's better to be safe."

Your partner says: "I won't enjoy sex if we use a condom."
Say you can't enjoy sex unless it's safe.

Your partner says: "I don't know how to put it on."
This one's easy: "Here, let me show you."